imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
