yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
ttyl tear gas
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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