i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.