I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
