she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize