I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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