NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize