He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
this will be a night to untag.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
