I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize