are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
