ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
