one might say we're banned from that church
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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