haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
