I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
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She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
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We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
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