wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
