if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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