..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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