Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
