Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize