it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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