What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
