Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
