How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
