Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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