Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I need to sanitize my soul.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
