Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
