i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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