i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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