just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Randomize
