just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
