But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
