i jhust puked up my retainher.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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