Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You ate ashes out of my bong
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
