I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
