Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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