Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Randomize
