oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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