Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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