You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
