You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
