Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
