I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
