problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
