Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
