Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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