Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize