If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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