How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
so let's talk penis.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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