Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
