brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
